I’ve got no hot water in my cottage and I can’t get hold of Kevin. It’s so weird. I phoned him late on Friday afternoon to enquire about the cottage, he said it’s available, I arrived 20 minutes later, he gave me the keys, didn’t ask a thing about me, no money has exchanged hands, and I haven’t spoken to him since. I feel like an abandoned squatter. It’s so great! Except now I don’t have hot water. So I went to find him at the Big House, but he wasn’t there. I thought maybe the cow-looker-afterer-person (what is that? I want to say a cow hand, but that sounds odd) would know where to find him, but his English was pretty much as non-existent as my Zulu. Or so I thought. When I realised English wasn’t an option, I just asked him in Zulu. What?! I did not know that I spoke Zulu. It was a very surreal moment for me. I felt so clever! To know how to do something that I think the entire population of South Africa (along with all the illegals) knows how to do, made me feel clever. I don’t care. I have Zulu in my genes. Now I know. Thanks Dad (he was fluent).
It’s a bit of a challenge being so off the beaten track. To get down to the River Cottage I have to open three gates, two of which are just wires stretched across the road which one unhooks to drive through, one of which is an electric wire. I discovered the electric wire gate by accident, the first time I unhooked it. What a shock! I went “Hey! Leave me alone. I’m not a cow.” I’m not. Anyway, I kind of was for an hour today because, there was no signal at the cottage and I had a very important work meeting, so I drove up the hill to the cow field. Cow paddock? Pasture? I feel like there are a lot of farm expressions that I don’t know. There I was sitting in the middle of the field, with my coffee and laptop, discussing techno work, with cows mooing and birds chirping. I had the most spectacular view across the valley. It felt quite normal, which goes to show how quickly I’ve adjusted to my new nomadic life.
In-between working I’ve been sneaking off to do meander-type fun stuff. Yesterday I went to Chocolate Creation, which offers a truly hedonistic chocolate fondue experience. You choose what you want to dip into the chocolate. I chose everything that was vegetarian, so I dipped things like gherkins, peppadews, cheese and fruit and nuts. It was in fact chocolate heaven. A big problem was that I can never eat very much in one sitting (I’m a grazer) and never too much rich food, so I really didn’t eat much of the chocolate, but… they said I could use the left-over chocolate to make chocolates with a mould, which I could then take with me. I walked away with nine chocolate hearts. I walked away happy! Chocolate dipping is my mud-fun. Chocolate makes me happy.
Today I decided to have a cheese and wine theme. I headed for the Marrakesh Cheese farm, where I did a cheese tasting of many, many delicious cheeses. They make cow’s milk cheese thank goodness, because I’m not a fan of goats milk cheese at all. And I learnt something so interesting today. I’m always careful about only eating cheese made with non-animal rennet, but I never knew exactly why the animal rennet used has to come from the stomach of a calf. Apparently, until a calf is weened, the milk it drinks by-passes the first three stomachs and flows directly into the fourth stomach, where the rennet thickens the milk to allow the calf to digest the nutrients. Cheese-making requires the same thickening process. Nature is such a perfect design! Maybe I wouldn’t mind being a cow after all. Because with four stomachs I could eat a lot more chocolate… and cheese. Tonight, I’m having a cheese and biscuit and wine picnic in my River Palace. Starting with fried halloumi. I was going to stop at The Wine Cellar on my way home, but in the end I had to rush back for my meeting. Doesn’t mean I don’t have wine for my picnic. I do.
This morning I went down to the river’s edge for some Zen river bubble blowing, which was such fun. And this evening I stood at the same spot, waiting for the water birds to fly by, as they do every evening at 5:30 pm. I’ve figured that one out. It’s incredible to watch them fly low over the river in perfect formation. Nature has its rhythms. Unfortunately my rhythms will see me head off in a day or two to the Jozi Smoke. That is going to be a huge shock to my system! I’m a little worried that my host will make me camp in her back yard if I don’t get some hot water for a shower. Uphi i-Kevin?