It’s been an interesting few weeks since I beat a hasty retreat back to JHB, after my health scare. I did something very unusual for me… I took myself off to a doctor, an allopathic type doctor, which I usually avoid doing, but I think the doctor I chose to see is a little bit on the alternative medicine side of the spectrum, so I justified it in that way. I have a long-standing bias towards certain medical doctors which I can’t really explain, but it oddly came up in conversation with my doc at the appointment, and I squirmed in my chair as I tried to describe (in very PC language) why I chose to see her specifically. She is a female, Muslim doctor. It’s about trust. It’s my bias. I can’t explain it in language that doesn’t offend, but thankfully I found words that didn’t seem to offend her. And I was right to choose her because it turns out she’s a cat person too, and that is reason enough for me. She also didn’t prescribe hectic meds for my high blood pressure. She just suggested I do interventions to bring my stress levels down. And then she sent me for blood tests, which sent my stress levels way up. I’d already consulted Dr. Google though and so I knew that I had a failing heart with 2 years max to live, probably leukemia with max 2 weeks to live, and almost definitely a catastrophic prostate issue. It came as a huge surprise then when my test results came back normal. Slightly elevated cholesterol, but otherwise I’m in excellent health! Can someone please get that message to my body.
It’s my health situation then, that’s keeping me in JHB for now. I’m definitely not a big city person, so Jozi is a challenge for me on so many levels, but even a city that is saturated in smog and noise and frustration can have moments of stillness and peace. When I got back from Mpumalanga I went looking for those moments, dragging my friend to many markets and animal sanctuaries (well, to be fair, she did a lot of dragging too) because I needed that grounding… and we had a lot of fun! I now have way too much jam, because I love interesting, exotic jams sure, but also because, as l’ve now discovered, I buy stories, not stuff. I learned this about myself at the vegan market. I always put in a spending rule boundary before I go to a market because otherwise it all ends in emptypurse tears, so I only had so much to spend. The problem was that there were so many amazing, unnecessary, have-to-have items in a gazillion beautiful stalls, that for this Libran it was a huge problem.
I found myself chatting away to the stall owners and of course they all have their unique and interesting stories . In the end, I found that I bought from the people who had the stories that resonated with me the most. I bought stuff (ok, yes it was jam) from a guy who shared his road to recovery from addiction and how he met his partner on that road and how they are working to stay on a positive path. I liked to hear about their courage, and was also amazed to see how fearless he seemed in sharing his story of vulnerability. That was the most expensive jam I’ve ever bought, but worth it. I bought more “stuff” from a mother who was working her stall with her teenage daughter. I loved it that she was showing, by doing, what initiative and creativity and hard-work can look like, and the rewards it can bring. I also loved having the chance to become part of her story by being her customer. It inspired and fed me in so many ways. There were other stories but I’d hit my market limit, so we left with our stash of stories and stuff, happy and feeling that the world is a good place after all.
Of course, I’ve been in Jozi for longer than planned, but it’s been a wonderfully enlightening time for me. I knew I’d be having people adventures, and it’s been interesting for me to see how adventures can also unfold in a very static kind of way. A group of insightful, sensitive and wise women sitting on a patio, sharing a breakfast lovingly made by their host, can embark on a journey together that takes them to unexpected corners of emotional shadows, creating pockets of trust where words can be spoken and held in deep understanding. Where these healing, growth moments are interrupted by bubbles of humour and cleansing laughter. These adventures have for me been worth a thousand solo sunsets.
But, yes… this time on the road has created stress in me that I can no longer ignore. I don’t feel the stress of it when I’m on the road, but the many, many decisions I’ve had to make have seemingly taken their toll. And having to be constantly alert and aware of potential danger… the weather, wild animals, dodgy humans… it’s been a lot. I’ve always liked living on the edge of danger and the excitement it brings, but I’ve changed… maybe I’ve aged and matured… it just doesn’t feed me in the same way anymore. I’m ready for more gentle adventures. So, unfortunately I’ve decided to call an end to my current drift, and hopefully I’ll be making my way back to Cape Town in the next two or so weeks. Drifting will always be part of my life, but I’m feeling now that I’d rather share those experiences with other humans, and in different ways, because one of the lessons I take from this drift is the value of companionship and shared adventures.
I’ll continue blogging about my experiences but it won’t necessarily be about travelling adventures. For those of you who have subscribed I’ll continue to notify you of new blog posts. If you don’t wish to receive these please feel free to unsubscribe (I hope you don’t). I’ll also be adding my 2021 drift blogs to the site, so for those of you who didn’t follow that drift you may enjoy my adventures retrospectively. You’ll see the crazy is not a new thing for me. Thank you all for joining me on this drift and for your caring and positive feedback!
Join me for a Past Drift adventure
