Driving towards Johannesburg in the pouring rain, I was reflecting on my journey so far, and I was thinking that it’s been rich in nature-spirit adventures and that perhaps for a while, in the big city, it will be more about people adventures. I’d hardly finished that thought and the people adventures began! The rain was bucketing down so hard that all the cars on the freeway slowed right down and put on hazard lights. It’s the safe way to drive under those conditions after all. We’re part of society, we know the basic behaviours that keep us and others safe. Not everyone though. I could hardly see anything the visibility was so poor, but there were these big SUVs shooting past me at normal speed, with their hazards on. Why bother? Maybe it’s a secret “so long suckers!” message to us cautious drivers, but if they did land up in a ditch from reckless driving, non of us cautious drivers would even know, because… zero visibility.
I had to stop for petrol about an hour out of Jozi, which meant that I was very close to “a rich and abundant opportunity to experience people adventures”. That’s what I’m calling the big city (aka ARAAOTEPA for short), to keep myself focused on the positive and stop the freak out in its tracks. It’s not that I hate big cities, it’s just that I’m not generally Bigcity fit, and I’d been alone in nature for a month. And horrors, the petrol 1-stop was packed with travellers, and one dishevelled car guard. I was so nervous about interacting with all these unknown energies, but I needed coffee, so in I bravely went. Like that brave, brave mouse that once upon a time, went marching through the house. And it was fine. People smiled. I chatted to a few stranger energies. We all stood in the queue and did the correct queue standing things that people do. I was so proud of us all for being the best queue standing version of ourselves. I even got to show someone where the sugar was, and she was disproportionately grateful (a fellow nervous nature-spirit adventurer perhaps?) and then I drove off with my coffee, feeling genuinely optimistic. My bar for people is low I know, but one has to start somewhere, and I was new to this type of adventure.
Jozi has changed since I left over 10 years ago. That arrogant “every man for himself” attitude is gone and it’s been replaced by a “we’re all in this together so we need to help each other out at every opportunity” kind of vibe. It used to be that the person behind you at a robot would aggressively hoot at you to go, a microsecond after the robot turned green, but now it’s a friendly hoot to show you that this robot is not a four-way stop, because it is actually working, and has turned green, so it’s ok to go. I was so busy looking for the homeless guy to direct me that I hadn’t noticed the red lights. Then green lights.
The homeless, unbelievably, direct the traffic when the robots are out, and the robots seem to always be out. And everyone accepts the authority of the homeless and assumes they are competent (some of them are). I was at a large intersection where this very clearly drunk guy had perhaps decided that because he’s homeless, by default he’s qualified, and he started to direct the traffic. He had a 2 litre bottle of coke, mixed I assume with something stronger, under one arm and he was wildly waving the other arm around. The confused drivers were trying desperately to make sense of his directions, and giving him a fair chance to clarify. People were looking at each other going “Is it us to go next? I’m not sure. What should we do?”, then shrugging and leaning forward in concentration, because these were proving to be extremely cryptic traffic directions. I was turning left, so I turned, without expert direction, and went on my merry way.
I can find it amusing because I don’t live here, but it must be hard to watch a once functional city become this run down. Almost no robots work and even here as well, the roads are pockmarked with potholes. But, if you use the roads you will be stopped regularly by very rude and weird traffic cops. Driving into Johannesburg on day one I was stopped at a roadblock. The cop asked me, very threateningly “Do you drink?!”, and for once I could honestly say “No”. I opened my mouth to launch into my story of how I used to drink a Western Cape amount of alcohol, but then I got long-covid and… he was not interested. He just said “Go!” I said “What?” He repeated “Go!” But, aggressively. I was hurt and I felt unheard. He didn’t even bother trying to coerce me into bribing him. Jozi certainly has changed.
The very next day I was stopped again by the cops. They pulled me over then simply ignored me. They went to the car in front of me and harassed that person, then the car behind. I sat there, once again feeling hurt and unseen and unheard. Eventually I called one cop over to shout at me and be rude, and he did a good job. He said “How much do you owe?” I’m not sure if this was a preamble to a bribe, I don’t speak Corruptcop anymore, so I was confused. I apologetically said “Nothing?” He said “When did you check!?” But, kind of shouting aggressively. It’s scary and confusing. I said “What?” But, quietly, like the little brave, brave mouse. And he just repeated himself. What do I owe. When did I check. So I looked at him with wolf-warrior eyes and I said “Nothing. I’m a law abiding citizen. I check my banking app for fines all the time”. All lies. But, wolf-warrior eyes… so he got confused and said “Drive!” So I did. And now I know why Uber and Bolt are so popular in Jozi.
Thank you BTW to the homeless if you’re reading this. You’re doing a great job! We appreciate you.